Want a Ride on my Spaceship?

Last week, I confided in my work colleagues – I told them about my spaceship.  This was the first time I’d ever told anyone, ever, even though I’d had it since the age of nine, so that’s forty years give or take.  

My colleagues found it hilarious, but we’re a close team and that was OK.  I’m sure they saw the sense in it.

My spaceship may or may not exist.  You can’t touch its hull or eat strawberries from it’s hydroponic garden in this universe, but I like to think there is a layer of the multiverse somewhere where it exists in the traditional sense of ‘real’.   It is crescent shaped, and enormous, and from the outside looks as though it's made of polished silver.

This is why I don't do my own graphics work

The spaceship can accommodate a few thousand people and will be used as an ark when the apocalypse kicks off.

It’s housed in a large aircraft hangar in a field in Cheshire, and is my personal means of punishing the nasty.

There is limited room on my spaceship so not everyone can come.  When the skies are ripped apart and the oceans boil, and Godzilla stampedes through Birmingham, or however the End comes about (not that I believe any doomsday stuff - this is just for concept's sake), there will be people who are under his foot and not on my spaceship.  

I can decide who those are.

It is a very satisfying pastime.  If I meet nice people, I make a mental note that they have a place reserved on the spaceship. If I meet horrible people (or, as I am not always that nice, people that I just don’t like),  then I mentally add them to the ‘barred’ list.

If I meet people who are particularly competent, I might even assign them a job on the ship.  I know, for example, who one of the pilots will be, one of the navigators, two chefs, several of the engineers and some of the mechanics. 

After I’d explained all this to my work colleagues – who reside day to day at the desks next to mine – they all wanted to know whether they are on it.  That, I am not at liberty to say. The essential rule about spaceship is that you can never tell anyone who is and isn't on it.

Clearly this rule will need to be broken when the apocalypse is imminent, so people can pack and that, but I am led to believe there will be Signs*.

(* I am not bananas. I don't believe in an Apocalypse, except perhaps one that we are making for ourselves and probably deserve. But the mental spaceship is a very good de-stresser for when people are being crap and I can't do anything else about it!). 

All the best, Mir xxx